16th August, values

It’s safe to say Ben’s had better Tuesdays. With a reminder of what he’s lost fresh in his mind, he decides to make the most of an opportunity for revenge.

The episode starts off with Sam driving through the Square, catching sight of Ben leaving the house with a cigarette in his mouth. I’ve come to see it as a sign of Ben needing to calm down and reaching for something that’ll provide that quick hit of relaxation. I don’t think anyone else on the Square smokes as a matter of fact; so it seems stark that we’ve got Ben doing it so often.
Phil opens the car door to confront Sam about his gun going missing from the safe, and Sam looks so pleased with herself as she suggests he check the boot. He does just that… and comes face to face with a strange man tied up in there, just as the postie walks by. It’s Lewis of course, but Phil’s never seen him before and has no idea Sam was even out there looking for him. After throwing the postie a tight polite smile (a sure sign something was up) he gets into the car next to Sam, who explains that that is the man who raped Phil’s son. She then casually offers him a hot coffee and reveals that the gun is actually in the glove compartment (which Phil checks, just to make sure.) He’s got no say in the matter as Sam drives off with him in the passenger seat and Lewis in the boot. I hope it was an especially bumpy ride.

Callum runs into Jay in the gardens, commenting on Jay’s late night and how he heard him stumbling back early this morning. Jay explains that it was because of the post-funeral drinks and the Baker boys keeping him there all night with a good time. This amuses Callum greatly, but it soon makes way for confusion as Jay mentions something that happened with Stuart which might cause problems between them, and he’s got no idea what Jay means. When he learns that Jay fired him though, he’s very much taken aback, even as Jay explains why he did it and the fact he had Pam forcing his hand too. Callum’s about to go and check on Stuart when his phone pings with a message from Ben. Jay helps to clarify for us that Callum hasn’t seen Ben since he got out of hospital, and at the news that Ben wants to meet for a coffee, he’s keen to know whether Callum will agree. Bless his little shipper heart. He also senses that this might be Ben trying to tell Callum the truth, and he tries to nudge Callum in the right direction when Callum wonders what the point is. Callum points out that Stuart needs him right now – but he should have learned from the last time he said that, which was right before he spotted Ben dying amongst the bin bags.
Jay knows how important this might be, so he offers to see Stuart if Callum goes to see Ben. With reluctance, Callum agrees but warns Jay that it doesn’t mean he’s giving Ben a second chance. That’s fine with Jay, who just thinks that once he’s there and Ben says what he has to say then it won’t matter anyway. He’s satisfied when Callum gets out his phone to reply to Ben.

We thought we were getting a comedy duo with Sam and Zack, but turns out it’s Sam and Phil providing the light relief. They got a good balance of light and dark with these warehouse scenes, I thought. There’s nothing funnier than Phil listing the possible ways this could come back to bite them, as if he thinks of all the same things when he’s hell bent on revenge. Kidnapping a man and taking him to a disused warehouse is suddenly more dangerous than storming across the square with a baseball bat in plain sight? Come on Phil.
He’s still hesitant even after Sam has an answer for all his questions, and Sam insists that this kind of the thing is the only way Phil’s going to feel better. But is that what matters here?

Outside the cafe, Felix catches sight of Callum just as he and his brother are considering sticking around even after their dad’s funeral the day before. He expresses an interest and then he and Callum ‘accidentally’ bump into each other as they pass. That’s some reflex on Callum, the way he grabbed Felix’ arm before he’d moved back! They’re muttering apologies to each other when Callum seems to recognise Felix (maybe from that time he watched him give his brother the orders about the BOGOF doves) and mentions that he’s the reason Jay looks like a ghost today. It takes a while for Felix to catch on, and I’m not even entirely sure he does, but he plays along and jokes about how he got a bit carried away.
Callum passes on his condolences about Felix’s dad, and there’s a hilarious moment when Felix seems to forget that he died and makes out like Callum’s heard some scandalous gossip about Avery. Even his brother Finlay shoots him a look of confusion, but then Felix acts like he’s remembered, before admitting he’s pulling Callum’s leg; he just couldn’t help giving into the brilliant awkwardness of death. At this point I’m not too sure whether it’s meant to be a meetcute – particularly as you have Ben approaching, looking miserable at the sight of Callum having a joke with Felix. He abruptly puts an end to things with a haughty comment to Callum about getting their coffee, not even acknowledging Felix. I reckon it’s not just jealousy over him speaking to Callum, but resentment that he can speak to his husband in a way Ben can’t right now; lighthearted and carefree and jokey.

Inside, there’s awkward silence as Callum sips his coffee and Ben struggles to form words. He’s also distracted by Zack incessantly trying to call him, which Ben tries to ignore, but I think like the Phil and Jonah interaction during their drink in the Vic, he’s drawn to it as a form of distraction because it delays the incredibly difficult task of telling Callum what’s going on. He decides to start easier, thanking Callum for meeting him. It’s amicable enough, with Callum responding that he wanted to make sure Ben was okay, even holding out an olive branch by saying he doesn’t want any bad feeling between them, which Ben agrees with. Considering Callum still thinks Ben cheated and has been trying to hold onto his anger over that; to have him say that feels quite positive, like he’s making an effort to move past it. He gives Ben the space to say what he wants to say, and Ben’s trying so hard. But like all the times before, the words still won’t come out. And he gives into the distraction of his phone again, which gets Callum’s back up and that bad feeling returns because actually, Callum can’t move past it. Can’t move past it because he loves Ben so much, it still hurts to think that he wasn’t enough and angers him that Ben doesn’t seem to care.
It’s why he can’t help but make the comment about an invitation to another one of ‘those’ parties (a chemsex party, that is.) Ben is instantly denying it, instinct being to insist he’s not doing that because it’s the truth. It seems like Callum doesn’t believe him, pointing out how dangerous they are (as if Ben hadn’t just nearly died from one.) Ben’s uncomfortable at having to protest his innocence, eyes shifting around the room. He reminds Callum that he only just got out of hospital, but Callum fires back that he’s the one who got him there; picking up the pieces like always. Ouch. It’s that that makes Ben give up – how can he tell Callum about the rape if he can’t even get Callum to believe that he’s not having reckless fun at chemsex parties? So he stops trying, and shuts down, lets Callum think what he wants. He makes a dry comment about not all superheroes wearing capes – because if even Callum is contributing to the good/bad dichotomy between them, how can it be anything but a bitter truth?
Callum carries on about the parties, wanting to understand what makes them more appealing than what they had together. I think he’s linked it to Lewis and the type of gay man Callum had him down as – young, free, single, non-monogamous. He’s not seeing it as Ben thinking it’s all he’s good for, or a way of blocking out trauma – he thinks it’s a choice Ben’s freely made and one that he wanted even when they were together. He can’t square that with the Ben he thought he knew so I guess is trying to see where exactly all this came from. Ben doesn’t clarify anything, just lets Callum draw whatever conclusions he wants – he asks ‘isn’t it obvious?’ which is exactly what he said to Phil in the hospital; but Phil had the knowledge of the rape which made it easier to understand that Ben did it to block it out. Callum doesn’t have that, so when Ben asks him the same question, the only thing Callum can come up with is that it’s about the sex – which is the excuse Ben used when he was trying to shut Phil’s own questioning down initially.
Ben neither confirms or denies it, which Callum takes as confirmation. Ben clenches his jaw at hearing Callum making those assumptions about him, but doesn’t correct him. He doesn’t want Callum ‘picking up the pieces’ so lets him think that Ben doesn’t want a real connection or proper love. He dares Callum to say out loud what he’s thinking, about how deep down Ben just wanted something dirty or squalid. Callum tries to say he’s not judging Ben for how he wants to live his life, but he is, and Ben knows it. But that judgement comes from his hurt and how he thought that they were on the same page, but now he thinks they weren’t, even suggesting they never were. He asks Ben who he wants to be but it’s not about who Ben wants to be, it’s who Ben thinks he’s destined to be because anything else isn’t available to him anymore. His opinion of himself hasn’t changed from the day he overdosed, even if the chem parties are over with because they didn’t help him forget.
Callum asks Ben why he asked to meet, and again, Ben only answers with a shrug (with a lot of forced nonchalance) to allow Callum to think whatever he’s going to think. Maybe he wanted Callum to draw a different conclusion, see through him and realise something’s wrong. But it doesn’t happen, and Callum gets up to leave, suggesting they don’t do this again. Ben fights hard to keep his aloofness until Callum leaves, and then he folds in on himself. That went well didn’t it?

While all this is going on, the hijinks continue at the warehouse. Sam may have set the gun on top of the car to retrieve Lewis from the boot, but it turns out to be Phil who doesn’t close the lid properly when he decides that they shouldn’t be doing this. He pulls Sam aside and tells her that they should let him go, which turns into a bickering match as Sam accuses him of refusing the plan because she’s the one who set it up. They’re too into it to notice the boot lifting and Lewis legging it – ironically as Phil’s just talking about having a brain in your skull. They move onto the subject of Ben, with Phil insisting that Ben doesn’t want this and he doesn’t want to go against Ben’s wishes, as Sam suggests that Ben’s possibly not in the right frame of mind to decide that he doesn’t want violent revenge. She also makes the dark prediction that Ben might be dead by the end of the year, which brings them onto the topic of the drugs. And as Sam turns to look at the real reason Ben took those drugs, she along with Phil finally realise that they’re alone.

The way they look around for him afterwards, still bickering, is peak comedy. I think we need more of this sibling back and forth between them in general. Sam suggests Phil go home, goading him by saying she’ll deal with Lewis on her own if he can’t handle it. Phil doesn’t rise to it, instead wanting them both to go home, since Lewis has had his scare anyway. Sam reluctantly agrees – until she realises the gun that she left on the car roof is gone. The gun she put there because she ran out of hands untying Lewis. She blames Phil for distracting her, and then hopes against hope that it simply fell off and is lying on the ground somewhere nearby. No such luck. It’s Phil who notices the open door of the warehouse, because of course a hostage would enter a building and risk getting cornered instead of trying to find the nearest road to get rescued!

When Jay runs into Callum outside the minute mart, he doesn’t even have to ask how it went, as Callum tells him straightaway that it went terribly, and he doesn’t want to talk about it either. I imagine Jay can gather from that that Ben didn’t tell him the truth, and now he has to uphold a promise not to bring it up with Callum anymore.
Callum changes the subject onto his brother, asking Jay how he is since that was Jay’s end of the deal. Jay admits that Stuart wasn’t home, but took a delivery for him. Maybe it went to the funeral parlour since the flat is accessed through there. Got to love Callum just opening Stuart’s post with no hesitation considering he doesn’t even live in that flat anymore, but we’ll put it down to the fact he’s already quite concerned about Stuart.
Not sure any of us could have predicted what would be inside – a coffin plaque with Stuart’s name on it. We learn later that Stuart has a check up at the doctors, so this is him making arrangements on the assumption that his cancer’s spread. In a move that possibly makes it clear why Jay had to fire him, Stuart’s year of birth is also wrong on the plaque. Better to assume it’s a character mistake rather than a show mistake when possible after all! Bless him. Anyway, it’s deeply confusing for both Callum and Jay, not to mention concerning that Stuart’s booked a coffin plaque that suggests he dies this year.

Ben’s still in the cafe, still ignoring Zack’s calls, when Lola comes in and spots him. She approaches to ask how he’s feeling, and of course Ben’s standard response is that he’s fine. She’s about to leave it at that when Ben calls her back, asking if he can come over to take Lexi to the park later. I feel like this is what he tried to do with Callum earlier before it went to pot – reach out and make amends. He picks up on her hesitance and questions it, only to find out that Lola doesn’t want him using Lexi to make himself feel better. She goes on to mention the parties and drugs and how it’s not good for kids. She gets a sarcastic reply about that being why Ben hasn’t invited her, but that’s not Lola’s point, it’s the negative energy he’s brought around her – in fact, Ben presumably hasn’t seen Lexi since he shouted at her in the dance studio. She seems to get that it’s a sign of Ben struggling and suggests Ben see someone because she doesn’t want to stop Ben seeing Lexi – if he gets his head sorted out then he can always see her afterwards, when he’s in a better frame of mind. It’s actually a softer approach from Lola than usual – but Ben’s still in a prickly mood after what happened with Callum and accuses her of cooking this up with him, judging Ben. He can’t stand the judgement because he knows it’s not true, but their assumptions reinforce his idea that he can’t be anything else, certainly not part of a loving family. He sees that family, Callum and Lexi, slipping away from him and he lashes out at Lola with a threat if she stops him seeing Lexi. It’s clear he’s still very resistant to the idea of professional help in this scene. And Lola points out his outburst as an example of what she’s talking about. She might not know what’s really going on but at least she’s put forward professional help as the solution – a solution that’s been mentioned countless times at this point, but Ben’s still not there yet.
The last thing he needs is Zack rushing in and sitting down in front of him, and he lets his frustration show. But it soon makes way for confusion as he listens to Zack talking about how Sam has lost it and made him pick up Ben’s mate and she’s now got him in a warehouse by the docks with a gun. Ben wonders what mate this could possibly be until Zack tells him that it’s Lewis, and the shock is clear.

Callum’s focus at this point remains on Stuart as he looks through the flat for him, on the phone to Rainie. The only person there though is Vi, casually doing the laundry as Callum quizzes her about Stuart, if she’s seen him and whether she knew he’d lost his job. He reveals what Rainie told him – that Stuart’s signed over his parental rights to Rainie, and that she’s told him she never wants to see him again. Callum’s in the middle of expressing his worries when he spots what’s on the table – the funeral list which Stuart started writing that morning. It’s heartbreaking, actually. He’s got Callum arranging his funeral, has picked Cokers as the Directors even though they sacked him, opened his funeral service to all, asked for donations to an addiction charity and wants his ashes scattered somewhere peaceful. There’s just a little something in my eye.
Vi assumes Stuart’s got bad news about the cancer, just as we cut to Stuart receiving the results of his latest scan. He’s assuming it’s bad news too.

Ben turns up at the warehouse just as Phil’s about to shoot Lewis in the face in a fit of rage. Which is understandable. Phil and Sam had found him in the warehouse, and he’d aimed the gun at them while he spouted the same stuff he did to Callum and Kathy and even Ben himself, about how he has proof of the messages Ben sent coming onto him. Phil yells at him to shut up, also requesting he keep Ben’s name out of his mouth (yes, everyone’s already said it, it’s his Will Smith moment.)
Lewis might be awful in every way, but god does he know how to read people and manipulate them based on that. He goads Phil for finding the thought of Ben coming onto him disgusting, because he knows from Ben what his dad thinks of him being gay – not the first time he’s broken Ben’s trust for his own gain. He’s trying to regain control here over Phil and Sam after being kidnapped against his will. His comment about not wanting to shoot them but that he will if he has to – it gave me the creeps, because that’s his attitude towards sex too. He’d have preferred to sleep with Ben consensually but when Ben’s consent was withdrawn, he forced him into it anyway.
The Face ID with Phil’s phone cracked me up as a Face ID user. Phil takes that moment of distraction to tackle Lewis, and when Sam sees Phil landing several (satisfying in my opinion) punches to Lewis’ face, her bravado about this being the right way to get justice falls away and she starts begging Phil to stop. The red mist has already descended though and he demands the gun, pointing it to Lewis as he begs for his life. There’s a sorry in there for ‘what he did’ but of course he’s going to say that if he thinks it might save his life. Unfortunately for him that doesn’t stop Phil – what does stop him is Ben. And the duff duff is him telling Phil that if anyone is going to shoot Lewis, it’ll be him.

They happened to catch Ben at a moment where he felt the loss of what he had particularly keenly, and his thirst for revenge therefore particularly strong. And one can’t blame him for that, at all.