3rd May, I know him

Well, our Big Ballum Fortnight has begun! And in this ep we had one last glimpse of happiness before things went to pot. And not forgetting Gwen Taylor’s debut as Vi Highway too.

Screencaps for this episode can be found here.

And yet another ep starts with our Callum, as he’s looking at the Missing Bailey poster as thoughtfully as one can whilst holding a Toby jug. I think as well as reminding us of that story and linking the two, it does the same job for Callum – linking Bailey going missing to his run in with Whitney the previous day as she’d been asking around. I imagine he’s got a lot of thoughts running around in his head about what makes a good person, maybe questioning his own judgement and morals because Whitney directly attacked them more than anything else. He’s startled out of his thoughts by Billy, trying to convince him to buy a second jug to go with the one he’s already got; leading Callum to question how Billy managed to rope him in into buying the first one.
Except we know why; because Callum is a sweetie and sometimes he does find it hard to say no, to push back against manipulation tactics or people dripping words into his ear. Sound familiar?
When Callum considers his need for a head examination, Billy points out that it’s for the wedding; referring to the tradition of having something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue – things which are historically meant to be worn by the bride for good luck, but obviously adapted over time and interpreted differently – and Billy takes advantage of this. Because what better item to have at your wedding for good luck than a mug shaped like a person bought from Billy’s stall?
Callum quips back about it giving them nightmares and Billy concedes that he doesn’t want the second jug, making out like it’s his loss – but Callum still walks away holding the first one so if I were Billy I’d take that as a win.
He’s still grinning down at the mug with amusement when Whitney rounds the corner to ruin his day. She mirrors his smile, but there’s no amusement there – as she figures out that the wedding must still be on if Callum’s still in a relatively good mood. Her declaration that she won’t be able to make the wedding is one dripping with sarcasm, so it does make a little more sense in this context. She tells him she’ll be too busy flying to Dubai to bury her fiancé, trying to pile the guilt onto Callum. She wants to hurt the Mitchells, and she’s using a tactic she thinks will work on Callum, which is guilting him into stopping the wedding. She thinks she knows from experience, but the circumstances are obviously so so different.
Callum gently tells her that he knows she’s upset, but Ben had nothing to do with what happened to Kush, going on to tell her that he doesn’t need to ask because he knows Ben. And Whitney once again tries to draw comparison with their own wedding, thinking that she can get Callum to reconsider like she did back then. She’s trying to make the case that you can’t be sure you really know someone – if only she looked a bit closer to home with that. I think she knows it’s not the same, but is throwing her grief and bitterness and sense of miscarriage of justice at him.
She goes on to remind him that he was hiding something and that it’s no way to start married life – knowing that was his motivation for coming clean back then. And although she’s thinking about Ben hiding something, I think the reference to Callum’s own secret is there. She’s unknowingly giving him advice to tell Ben the truth to avoid starting married life on a lie. I think Callum conflates the two – he’s starting to think that it’s possible Ben’s hiding something from him because he’s hiding something from Ben.

And just to reinforce the niggling doubts Callum’s having, he walks into the café in time to catch the tail end of a conversation Ben’s having on the phone (with that bluetooth receiver technology again), and it just so happens to be Ben asking the other person to say nothing, keep schtum. And when Callum’s already in the frame of mind that Ben might not be being honest (which at this point, I’m sure is just him projecting), it doesn’t help.
Still, he doesn’t say anything to Ben, and when Ben turns around, they look at each other for a moment – Ben in his suit get up, and Callum with a Toby jug in hand. Ben gets in there first, expressing horror and disgust at the jug (but softening it with a few ‘babe’s). It’s a very outdated item and Ben exclaims that even a straight man wouldn’t be seen with one – meaning it’s a massive let down on behalf of the gays.
Callum’s just amused at the protestation, and even though he was saying similar negative things about the jug to Billy earlier, he must have grown a bit fond of it during his walk from the market to the café, and reasons that it’s something old so they have the full set now. Would love to know what the other things are, if we’ll get to find out. Ben’s clearly not convinced though, and makes a face.
Callum moves the subject onto Ben’s get up, and asks if he’s going somewhere. Ben’s noticeably vague, claiming it’s just a meeting he’s got – and it’s noticeable because I imagine he’s normally quite open with Callum, as was implied during the business with the car heist and later with Stas. Ben tries to move the subject back to Callum, if he’s still catching up with Nancy (which made me really happy – acknowledgement that they know each other even if they’ve not shared the screen yet!) but Callum tries to dig for more info on this meeting Ben’s having. I don’t think he suspects anything in particular, but rather he’s using it as a way of testing if Ben can be honest with him; maybe thinking if he hides this, what else is he hiding? But he picked the wrong thing to inquire about because telling Callum would ruin the surprise – not that he knows that yet. He gets the brush off, in a way that might be construed as patronising if it had been dodginess; but of course it’s not. Ben jokes about his air of mystery, claiming it’s what Callum loves about him and refusing to say any more, heading on out.
His comment turns it back to Callum again – his air of mystery being something Callum loves, unknowingly placing guilt back on Callum’s shoulders with regards to Whitney and her insistence that he’s as bad as Ben for standing by him, giving him little niggles that he’s the one with the problem and who has to say something.

After a scene with Kathy and Bobby in the Beale house where Kathy reveals she’s heading over to pick up Ben and Callum’s wedding rings (eek!) we see where Ben was having his secret meeting – in the café on Victoria Road that is generally used as a meeting spot for characters away from the prying eyes of neighbours on the Square. He’s there with Stuart, and he’s nervously fixing his suit and asking him how he looks. At Stuart’s response – that he’d give him a solid six out of ten – he spins to his reflection in the window so fast it probably gave him whiplash. Him seeking approval from Stuart of all people and actually believing him just shows he’s a bundle of anxiety. Stuart is fully revelling in it, teasing that it would be a seven if he put a tie on and doesn’t he want to make a good impression? Easy for him to say, he’s just there in his undertaker outfit – but he’s enjoying winding Ben up. Ben’s not amused – he tells Stuart he’s doing this for Callum, he doesn’t need a personality transplant. I think Stuart can tell Ben’s trying to convince himself rather than Stuart, and jokes that he’d have introduced them sooner if he’d known it’d been so easy to ‘put the wind up a Mitchell.’ But of course, the only reason Ben’s nervous is because of the connection to Callum, and it’s someone he can try and start off on the right foot with for once.
Stuart does take a bit of pity on him and tells him to relax, she’s a pussycat – as long as you mind the claws.
And the focus of Ben’s nerves, this pussycat, finally turns up, and it is of course Nana Highway. Her focus is on Stuart at first, and clearly she’s fond of him, calling him a sight for sore eyes, while Stuart beams. She then looks to Ben… and asks for a cup of non instant coffee. The poor boy’s been mistaken for the waiter, which – considering they’re in a tiny run down cafe – is hilarious. But bless, him, he’s just standing there awkwardly ready to greet her so he did look ready to serve.
Vi looks around for Whitney then, at first seeming like she’s forgotten in her old age who she’s really here to meet, but when Stuart politely intervenes and reminds her that he told her – gesturing to Ben, who gives an adorable awkward wave – it’s clear that she does know after all, giving Ben the once over and referring to him as the one Callum’s ‘skinny dipping in the other end of the pool with.’ It clearly throws Ben off and he visibly wavers, touching his nose and his ear in a sign of discomfort as she introduces herself as Vi – but he can call her Violet.
Stuart seems to be enjoying the awkwardness as he watches for Ben’s response – but he keeps it together, and introduces himself in response, being perfectly polite and telling her it’s lovely to meet her. She responds that his name is just going to have to be Whitney because it’s too confusing for her at her age – which is bullshit, she’s obviously as sharp as a tack. She’s clearly making a point of being resistant to the fact her grandson’s about to marry a man; and it’s something she’s going to have to get over. Poor Ben, he doesn’t know what to say so just smiles along awkwardly.

Back at the Mitchell house, while Callum’s stressing on the sofa, we see that Toby jug in focus in the foreground, before the focus shifts to Callum. I’m starting to think that jug means something, with all the attention its had in this ep.
The door opens and Callum hears Ben calling his name. He gets to his feet, all ready to have a confrontation with Ben as he walks in. He tells Ben to sit down for a second, but Ben’s eager to reveal his surprise. Callum doesn’t listen to what Ben’s saying, focused on having this out, and I think he maybe interprets Ben ploughing on as another example of him being evasive with him, and in the face of Ben’s nervous ramblings about surprises, he just blurts it out – did Ben kill Kush?
Ben can’t quite believe what he’s heard, and Callum’s already wavering in his conviction, but telling Ben he needs to know if he had anything to do with Kush dying. Damn those little brain worms. Ben doesn’t even justify the question with an answer – because he already gave Callum one, and he’s puzzled as to why Callum would be asking him again. It’s Callum manifesting his own attack of the guilties into paranoia over Ben keeping something from him as well.
Nana Vi chooses this moment to make her way in, bored of waiting for Ben to make an introduction. Ben strides over to the window at this, which was obviously a result of social distancing rules but also works well as him moving to maintain some distance from them as he wallows in the revelation that Callum might not trust him.
Callum is obviously shocked at his nan’s entrance, punctuated perfectly by Ben’s sarcastic “surprise”. There’s a moment of Stuart smiling over at Ben, but then turning back with it slightly faded as he’s sensed the frosty atmosphere. Vi’s comment about Callum having his hat surgically removed really tickled me – and makes me wonder how long he’d actually been wearing it for. There’s a grandad mention – who we now know was called Freddie – as Vi tells Callum he looks just like him, and wonders what he’d have to say about ‘all this’; which obviously means Callum getting married and being with a man. Callum has a bit of hero worship around his grandad, and that comment might have struck a bit of a nerve. Might have, if Callum wasn’t distracted with the fact that he and Ben have an unfinished conversation to get back to – and they keep glancing to each other, Callum antsy while Ben tries to stare him out. Vi maintains that she has nothing against the gays – with an unspoken ‘I just put my foot in it about the subject on a constant basis instead’. I have to say that the comments she makes do remind me of early Jonno, before he turned really nasty. But the intention here is clearly different as far as I can tell, with Vi coming round and learning, compared to Jonno, who doubled down – and that’s something that’s even alluded to as Stuart brings Jonno up, and Vi tells him he was never as open minded as her.
She wonders if the cat’s got Callum’s tongue, as he hasn’t said anything yet (he hasn’t had a chance to get a word in!) but Callum just plays it off as surprise, which probably isn’t a lie. He’s probably realising that his suspicions were totally misplaced, especially as it then comes to light that it was Ben’s idea to get her over as a surprise for Callum. Vi eventually catches on to the tense atmosphere and the frosty looks from Ben, asking if there’s trouble in paradise already. Callum’s keen to assure her, but Ben isn’t in such a rush. Trouble in paradise indeed.
Vi heads off to ‘wet her lettuce’ (I’ll let you google that one), leaving Stuart to throw a pained look at Callum, who gives him a tight smile in return – glancing once more to Ben, who’s not in the mood for polite platitudes.

When we return to the scene, Ben’s still standing as Callum brings in a tray of tea and Stuart sits on the sofa. It’s noticeably awkward and stilted, and Ben can’t take it anymore, announcing he’s heading to the Arches. Stuart rushes to excuse himself first, motioning to the door as he leaves to see if Granny Vi has fallen down the toilet.
When he’s left, Callum tells Ben he can’t just go, they need to talk. But Ben doesn’t seem to be in the mood for that – he’s miffed that Callum’s practically accused him of murder and he isn’t willing to wait it out until they’re alone and play Long Lost Families in the meantime. The jibe annoys Callum and he asks Ben why he can’t ever just be straight up with him – even though he’s the one not being straight up. I think it was a bit of Callum lashing out because he can see he got it wrong – almost turning the blame on Ben a bit for being secretive about Vi, as well as the fact he didn’t actually answer Callum’s question.
Vi returns, finally, complimenting them on their fancy lav and three ply toilet paper while Stuart makes faces behind her. She decides not to comment on the tenseness this time, and turns to Callum to comment on how he’s landed on his feet instead. Ben chips in with a sarky ‘hasn’t he just’ while Callum squints at him in annoyance.
It comes to light that Vi didn’t spend all her time up in the loo – she went for a nosey as well. Just to get her bearings in case of emergencies, of course. She asks Ben if the pink room is theirs, another little dig that Callum rolls his eyes at, but Ben corrects her, informing her that it belongs to Lexi, his daughter. It’s news to Vi, but she plays it off, feigning understanding that he’s dabbled but just not fancied it, just like how she decided she doesn’t fancy piccalilli after having a dollop (which in fairness does looks a bit gross).
She continues to nose about, and spies the photo frames on the cabinet – namely the picture of Phil holding a baby aloft, which could be either Ben or Louise; instinct says Louise, but I guess the identity of the baby doesn’t matter as Vi’s interested in Phil himself, commenting on how he has a Bruce Willis look about him… if you squint. Or close your eyes. Stuart finds the comment very amusing, and Callum indulges his reaction, but doesn’t share it. He explains to Vi that it’s Ben’s dad, or as Vi calls him, father of the bride. At this point neither Ben nor Callum are in the mood to be polite, they just want rid so they can hash things out. Fortunately Stuart is rather astute for once and picks up on it, suggesting to Vi that he take her round Walford, including the Vic. Callum says she can meet Rainie while she’s there, but Stuart shoots that idea down – she’s busy with a funeral. Or busy avoiding Vi.
Talk of Rainie being busy with work causes Vi to turn to Ben and ask him what he does for a living. And calls him Whitney again, this time in front of Callum, who looks towards the sky for help. Ben, bless him, doesn’t let it faze him and answers her – they run a family business. He’s cagey about what sort of family business, insisting to Vi that he doesn’t want to bore her with the details. I actually don’t think this was anything to do with their dodgy deals, because he could have said the same thing Callum said to Vinny – that he’s a mechanic, or even that he owns the garage, which is true regardless. But I wonder if he maybe thought that wasn’t good enough, not impressive enough. Even if it’s meant to be another nod towards keeping things back, I think him feeling inferior can be true as well. He can see she’s got a sharp tongue and I think it does set him on edge; which she notices and all. She tells Callum to keep an eye on him; little does she know how well they know each other, even if Callum’s having a wobble.
Stuart takes charge then, making another suggestion they leave the ‘lovebirds’ to it and head to the café. She finally relents and heads out the door, as Stuart makes a face at both of them behind her back – she’s hard work, she is. Ben and Callum are finally alone.

Ben’s moved to the kitchen for our final scene of the ep, looking out the window. He doesn’t know what to say, and it’s Callum who approaches him, keeping a distance by the doorway. He’s not indignant or defensive at Callum’s question, he’s just sad. He takes it as a sign Callum doesn’t trust him, and wonders what the point is if he doesn’t.
Callum starts to talk about how he knows what it’s like to lie to the person you love the most, how it eats you up and you can’t eat or sleep. And I think for Ben, he’s heard it before, in relation to Whitney and he thinks that’s who Callum’s talking about, but this is building up to Callum’s confession and therefore I reckon he’s talking about last year, all that Thompson business and having to keep it from Ben.
Ben hears him talk about the effect that can have on someone, keeping a secret, and wonders how Callum can think he could do it to him, how he could marry him if he was concealing that he killed Kush. It’s unspoken, but I’m sure they’re both thinking about the Keanu debacle and how Ben broke almost instantly when Callum confronted him.
Ben acknowledges his past mistakes, but tells Callum that since he’s had Callum in his life, he’s changed. And when you think about the Ben of summer 2019, he has changed. And since he vowed to be better for Callum in January 2020, he’s tried. And since the warehouse footage came to light he’s made a pointed effort to be honest with Callum, to the point where Callum knew all the Mitchell secrets and where Ben was going and who he had dealings with. He swears that there aren’t any secrets, that when they cleaned the slate, he kept it clean. What he doesn’t know however, is that the slate isn’t clean, and it’s not because of his secrets; it’s because of Callum’s. And Callum decides he has to come clean; so he can promise to be honest to Ben in his vows, that they can start married life on that clean slate.
He’s intrigued Ben with the talk of not having a clean slate, and he goes on to admit, after a little lip chew, that he lied about being undercover. Ben has no idea where this is going, while Callum’s already throwing in explanations before he’s said what exactly he lied about, trying to soften the blow before it comes. He explains that the thing he said about Jack asking him to get evidence against Thompson to bring him down wasn’t true. At this point, I think Ben knows, because he was told that that was the plan they came up with after Thompson tried to get Callum to take down Phil. But he wants Callum to say it – or not say it, prove his suspicions wrong. But alas, when Ben asks who in that wobbly voice, trying to keep it together, Callum starts in with the explanations again and all but confirms it. But still, he wants to hear Callum say it, and so he waits, and eventually he does – he was after Phil for real during that time he was apparently gathering evidence on Thompson. And we end with a duff duff on Ben’s expression – one of disbelief and incredulity, I think. Because Callum was questioning whether Ben was keeping something from him two minutes before, and now it’s come out that Callum was the one keeping something from him.

EE have obviously attempted to simplify the situation, because it was mega confusing. Callum gathering evidence on Phil would still have happened if what he said had been true, because he’d have had to keep up the pretence to Thompson. That’s where it gets a bit muddled for me, I think. Though of course the simple act of gathering evidence on Phil via the bug and the wire put Phil at risk regardless; he was just lucky that Phil never incriminated himself as he was busy with Raymond.
We’ll obviously hear more about how they view the situation tonight, but revealing the half truth in January does start to make a bit more sense when coupled with Ben’s line in that episode to Jay about marrying Callum. It means in Ben’s eyes the whole engagement and marriage path could be built on a lie. They had Callum making himself look good in that ep, coming across like he knew what to do and went straight to Jack, leading Ben to give him heart eyes in the Vic and think about proposing, and then saving the rest of Callum’s confession for the week before the wedding because drama. But let’s see how it goes….